Diet begins today

Ok, I just started with my cleansing diet but oh, I feel like being killed slowly haha. My worst enemy is water - clear, tasteless, boring. How can I survive without drinking soda? Aside from water, I need solid foods, but dang I forgot to buy apples T_T Now my body's shaking, but I don't have a choice, I really can't go down as I can't leave my post. Now what will I do? My head is starting to ache, my stomach grumbles, my eyes shutting - ultimate. But again, I need to do this, to kill myself bwahahaha. I am giving myself one week, and I need to push myself hard. Starvation might not be a solution, but I got no choice. xD